Shark Trespassing Week on the Discovery Channel!

Long ago, before "Mythbusters", "Dirty Jobs", and "Man v. Beast", Shark Week was the highlight of the Discovery Channel lineup. It turns out that the Discovery Channel may have been slandering the sharks. This from Gilbert Arenas in his most recent flurry of posts:

I know this is random, but I just want to clear this up for people out there.

There are these things called shark attacks, but there is no such thing as a shark attack. I have never seen a real shark attack.

I know you’re making a weird face as you’re reading this. OK people, a shark attack is not what we see on TV and what people portray it as.

We’re humans. We live on land.

Sharks live in water.

So if you’re swimming in the water and a shark bites you, that’s called trespassing. That is called trespassing. That is not a shark attack.

A shark attack is if you’re chilling at home, sitting on your couch, and a shark comes in and bites you; now that’s a shark attack. Now, if you’re chilling in the water, that is called invasion of space. So I have never heard of a shark attack.

When I see on the news where it’s like, “There have been 10 shark attacks,” I’m like, “Hey, for real?! They’re just running around? Sharks are walking now, huh! We live on the land, we don’t live underwater.”

Don't be surprised if Arenas brings a suit against Discovery Channel on behalf of the sharks.